Category Archives: Work related

On to my 4th day…

… of being useless/idle.

I’m really getting tired of doing nothing, not much on the physical though. It’s not that I’m too excited to work and show off to my new boss. It’s the thought that I will be getting some pay despite just sitting here in my cubicle. It’s an ego thing for me. I feel worst ‘coz I am ineffectual for the post I was hired for. Blame me not. It’s them who ask me to report immediately. Unfortunately, they were not ready for my arrival.

Now, I’m seriously reconsidering some options. A good pay is pretty tempting, but an unorganized and unstable company can be a headache in the future.

Anyway, I’ll be on half day today to discuss my pending application with another company. It’s with the dream job, by the way. I just had my pre-employment medical exam last week and the company doctor will discuss to me the results. I hope they find me healthy enough to be hired. I pray that the offer in the coming weeks will be as competitive with my current.

I wasn’t able to go on leave this afternoon. Less than three hours before our time off, they gave me something to do, something simple, something out of my expectations as a financial analyst. But I remained humbled and accepted the task. No harm just a slight blow on my ego. Also, they promised to issue a laptop tomorrow. Sadly, I have told myself that I will not go to office tomorrow to attend to my pending application. Pray for me!

Photo credits here.


Welcome to the tribe

Despite the dilemma I have with my career, I have made a half decision. (Note: half decision means I’m still open for a possible change within a month.) I was just being practical in accepting the job offer from a telecom company.

And it’s my first day in work today!

No work performed yet but I’m looking forward to applying what I have learned in actual practice in audit and in theory from college.

Good luck to me!

Note: Image above is owned by wi-tribe. Please observe the terms and conditions attached in using the image presented.


People often whine for having no options to choose from, for being constrained on following just one path, for having no freedom of weighing things. That could be pretty frightening and pitiful.

But there comes a time in our life when one would wish he doesn’t have a choice, where he doesn’t have to weigh things, where there is only one road to lead to. For in those kinds of situations, regrets will not be possible.

Miserably, I am in that dilemma right now in my career life. I am caught between a “sure job” and a “dream job”.

When I quit my job from public practice of audit, I told myself that I’m going to take a rest for a month and be a bum for the meantime. But I realized I have a lot of obligations to myself and my family that I couldn’t go back being a dependent again. Three weeks before my last day in my previous job, I disseminated my CV to various companies. It was frustrating at first ‘coz they were like taking a lifetime to get back at me. But as day passes, opportunities were crashing in.

That’s when I entertained a financial analyst job for a start up telecommunication company. I didn’t know that it would be that fast, though I went to their office more than 6 times during the hiring process. It paid off nonetheless coz they already asked me to report on Monday. This is the sure job.

Simultaneously, I applied for a less important job as an accountant for an industry leader oil company. I’ve been targeting this company since last year. I have passed already some levels in their hiring process. Yet I declined pursing it further due to some assignments I have with my previous employer. Now that I’m free, I revived my application with them and they gladly consider me again. I’m few steps away from the job offer but it felt like that they are taking too long. This is the dream job, nonetheless.

The sure job offers a competitive and pretty inviting salary despite issues on stability. Further, I’ll be having a supervisor position. The dream job has not given a job offer yet so the salary remains undisclosed but I think it would be lower than that of the sure job and the position is less important again than those of the first one. But the “dream job” wouldn’t be a dream job for nothing. Stability isn’t a question. The learning will be there and the opportunity to grow is present, but may take time. The salary may not be grand but there’s a steady increment every year and the benefits are beyond expectations that I didn’t know it exists. Lower management receives competitively enough versus the presidents of some companies.

Now, what do I choose? Dream job or sure job?

I’m torn. Really. Ambitious as I am, obviously, I am leaning towards pursuing the dream job. Who wouldn’t? But I am also broke, near insolvency and illiquidity. And for practical reasons, accepting the sure job won’t hurt me. It would even take care of my bills now. But what would happen if I accept it and withdraw the other one? What if I choose the wrong job? That’s where my indecision is coming from.

The irony here is that the two companies are affiliated being subsidiaries of a giant food and beverage company.

I decided to pick the sure job for now without necessarily dropping my application with the dream job in an oil company. The latter is taking its time so while waiting, I would spend my time working and earning with the telecom company.

The Job Examination Experience

Early today was my scheduled examination and job interview for a bank I applied for. Though it wasn’t my first time since I started hunting again, it was my first examination for like a year. I usually have interviews only for assessment. The rest were being taken care of by my résumé. As I was saying, the experience and the thought of taking an exam were kind of funny ‘coz I literally prepared for it. A friend who just got in there, hinted me about the type of exams they are giving. A lot of essays or compositions she said. That pacified me ‘coz I think it’s my forte- to be wordy. The excitement and the nervousness I am feeling was not mine alone as my mom and my dad were experiencing the same. It brings back the memories I have when I was applying for college in a reputable school here in the Philippines where my parents accompanied me in the testing center and waited for me outside for hours. They did that to the rest of my school applications then. And I was having the same support today. =-)

My schedule is at 1:15pm. I was supposed to go there alone. I don’t know the place but thanks to Google Map ‘coz it gave me an idea of how to get there. Besides, as long you have money, you can always take a cab. That’s my plan. But when somebody says “suppose” somewhere in his statement, you should know that whatever verb or word that follows it must have not happened. My mom and my dad took a half day leave from their office to accompany me to the recruitment office of the bank. I was really surprise ‘coz both of them were calling me during lunch to meet with them somewhere in the area. I told them they didn’t have to. It’s not like I’m too young to be on my own. I’m not even attending a family day event in school. Anyway, they were there already and all I can do is appreciate their support. I felt like half my age. =-)

The day went well, though I was almost late (barely fifteen minutes for the time set). It’s really a no-no, a disgrace for professionals to come late for any exam or interview during job application ‘coz it establishes an impression. I really have to thank my dad for driving me to the bank’s office. As I got there, I was pretty surprise to see a lot of applicants in the recruitment lobby. I should have expected it ‘coz I’m applying with the largest bank in the country. I looked around the swarm of people and see how everyone looks like. I smiled and tell myself that I am better than they are. This was first manifestation of my pride.

As I was sitting in the testing room along with other 20+ applicants, I tried my best not to fall asleep. The exam hasn’t started and I feel bored with nothing to do. I’m starting to get uneasy waiting. I was near my frustration limit ‘coz the exam started at 2:10pm, almost an hour late. The reason- they were accommodating walk-in applicants to join those who were scheduled for the day. I told myself this is not the way to treat professionals. I was expecting that the infamous ‘Filipino time’ will be a thing of the past for an organization as big and reputable as the bank. I also felt somewhat upset for a moment. I was applying for a position as internal auditor, with a rank of Junior Assistant Manager among bank officers. Then, here I am waiting for an hour for the exam. It was further aggravated by the fact that I am taking the same exam with those applying for an entry level post. It was not really the bank’s fault. It was just my pride taking over. A friend who applied for the same position and got it eventually had a different experience. She had it in the recruitment main office, only took a personality exam and then proceeded to an interview. I was hoping for the same treatment since I am an experienced professional and of the same level with my colleague. To release my tension (I was on the brink of walking out), I prayed to God to guide me with my decision and give me knowledge and wisdom to finish the examination. After that, I felt the Holy Spirit blessed me with patience and humility. I said to myself that this is just a test of character. A professional knows when to complain. That moment wasn’t worth of it. Further, it will be my lost if I didn’t proceeded with the exam. Thank you God for the discernment!

So how’s the exam? It was easy, though I had a hard time figuring out the last two items in the abstract and writing down the definition of ‘accounting’ as set by the American Institute of Certified Public Accountants (AICPA). My God, the last time I heard about it was four years ago when I was reviewing then for the licensure. When you get to work, you seem to lose interest in theory and be rather adept with the actual practice or the standards. But then again, I should really brush up my basic accounting and auditing knowledge, just in case they ask me about the definition of auditing or the 10 GAAS.

Now, I just hope I’ll do well in the interview (scheduled for Friday) and secure the position and my target income. The pressure is on ‘coz my days in the firm are numbered. I still have three assignments to finish and I also have to do my turnover. If I get the job this early, that would be a subtraction to my worries. Pray for me!

I was seated earlier with a girl who attended the same school as I am. Having a common background, we seemed to jive. I really have to thank her ‘coz I am almost choking with my saliva for not talking. But though she’s a year older or two (she’s 25, I don’t know if she’ll turn 26 some time this year), it felt like I was more mature than her. I was giving her advice about career and trying to change her outlook in life. I sounded like someone from the Guidance Office or from HR lecturing a girl to be ambitious. I really pity those who just want to achieve less than the big opportunity they are given. If only I can take away that opportunity from them and give it to those who are willing to take on the challenge. But then again, who am I to judge them? I am not yet as successful as Bill Gates, Steve Jobs or Warren Buffet to give wisdom on career and life in general.  Still I’m happy ‘coz I have enlightened someone today. I just hope she’ll take it all in and act on it.

Image source: Credits to Daily Mail UK


It’s been a week since I tendered my resignation from the firm I have worked for almost four years. It wasn’t easy but I feel that it was the right thing to do. Though I’m scared of breaking the habit I was accustomed doing and the familiarity I am used to, it felt like it was just time for me to move on. And though I regret leaving friends, I feel the change will be beneficial to my long-term career plans.

The decision wasn’t a hasty one. I’ve been thinking about it since October of last year. But because of the sense of gratitude I have towards my boss and the financial security my work has provided me, I abandoned my plans, including two good employment offers. I don’t know if I made the right decision of staying then, but recalling the events after October, there is nothing good I can think of that happened to me, aside from developing a special feeling with a girl (which happened early February of this year). Though the latter didn’t prosper into anything better, it was enough I guess to compensate to all the negative things that happened.

Though it’s just normal to leave the public practice after some time, friends are still asking why I will leave the firm. Many believe that the recent event lead to my decision. Maybe but it’s more of just a triggering event. When I didn’t receive my bonus in full, I felt devastated. I felt I was cheated by the firm. I wanted to quit that very moment I learn their issue against me. But I didn’t. It would be like giving them a favor if I did. But then again, it affected to me so much and my morale hit an all time low. I know I have to quit sooner or be stuck again.

Aside from that, the main reason for my leaving remains to be because of my fear of stagnation. Recently, I have said to my co-seniors that life in the firm ends when one becomes a senior. There was nothing more left in the ladder of growth than to move laterally. The firm has become fond of hiring supervisors and managers from outside or pirating others from the Big 4 that they neglect the homegrown talents or seniors who have been with them for at least two years. That is sad. For someone as ambitious as I am, that’s terrible. Also, any promotion for me has become vague after the recent event.

Another reason is that my theory of inverse relationship between growth for an entity and its people-oriented core value must be real. The firm has been busy planning meeting their target income. They have implemented a lot of cost-cutting measures that lead to dissatisfaction of employees, including no pay for overtimes and red tape on reimbursement of company-related expenses incurred by staff. Even on issuance of supplies such as sign pen and tissues has been limited, if not stopped. To read in their minutes of meeting about time charges and overtime pay, to let the staff “bleed” is much upsetting. I hope they won’t focus so much on earning ‘coz they will lose the prized asset, the unsung heroes of the firm- the people.

What nerves me off, which is another factor, is the losing essence of our human resources department. The HR that should be concern of the welfare of the employees has become a nuisance and most of the time, a troublemaker. I hope they realize this. Try soliciting opinions about the HR, the response will be an overwhelming whine. Further, the qualities of people they are hiring are deteriorating. Office politics have gone out of control. I have survived four tax or busy seasons in the firm and each passing year, I am getting used to unbelievable work loads, the more than 8 hours of work and dealing with more difficult people. But I think my stock of understanding and patience has run out this time. It’s time to replace the difficult people with pleasant ones. Friends will forever be cherished wherever I am.

The last reason, which is such a cliché but so true in all cases, is the great opportunity waiting for me outside. I know I owe a lot to the firm for honing my skills and contributing to my competence and market value, but I think I have already paid my dues. All the sleepless nights, unpaid overtime, shattered pride, I think it’s them who owe me now. Hearing stories from colleagues who left the firm and those who lead the road most traveled, it’s only normal to crave what they have achieved. Further, coming out from the Chairman’s mouth, he wants us to become future leaders or captains of the industry which I think is unrealizable if one will stay for long in the firm. Three years and eight months of stay is already long. In my opinion, the firm is not that equipped to develop on its own someone to be at par with the industry leaders. We have to gain that outside, from graduate school, from other company or even from competitors. And that’s what I’m aiming for to learn more and widen my spectrum. I want the time to come that the firm will be proud of me and claim that I have been part of their organization. I hope to do the same with the firm- be proud of the firm where I came from without explaining why.

Despite the criticisms and untoward emotions I have for some people in the firm, I have to admit that I am leaving the firm with a heavy heart. I will miss the people, the friends who have contributed so much to my character, to my maturity. They have become my sole reason for staying. I will forever be grateful for the opportunity of meeting all of them. If it wasn’t for the firm, I wouldn’t get to know these wonderful people. For all the love, respect, fun, regret, lost opportunity, pain, challenges, friendship and everything, thank you. They are all a part of me now. My resignation doesn’t end anything between me and them. Leaving is not saying goodbye, rather it’s ‘see you later’.

I pray God will guide me in to my next journey, which I know He will, and hope that He’ll lead me into a place with more opportunities and happiness, where I can provide more to my family and myself, without neglecting my obligations as a servant of You. God bless me!


Even if the decision has been made a week ago, I am still fazed with the uncertainty waiting for me at the end of the month. There’s no job waiting for me yet. That is why I am cramming sending out my résumé to various companies, including clients, in the hope of getting one soon. I almost secure one but I have to decline for not meeting my target income. I’m not being choosy. I’d like to believe that quality comes with a price. =)

I love my parents!!!

I love my parents more after everything that has happened. I love my parents so much ‘coz they’ve been supportive of me from the start. They understand what I am going through and they honor my feelings, my pain.

I am not that super close to my parents but I do open up some matters when it comes to my career. I know they’ve been expecting the financial help the bonus would have contributed if only I have received it in full. We’ve been planning what to do with that money as early as last week of May. But I think it was a curse to count the chicks before the egg hatches. And after last night, I was having some trouble breaking the sad news to them. They’ve been eager to hear any updates about it. I know I might break into tears if I tell it to them face to face. But I have to tell it to them in any way. SMS. I did it through text message early afternoon.

Like me, they were frustrated too. Though they didn’t say anything, I know they are mad too. But instead of hearing the usual nags I get from them and the casual advice of me quitting my job whenever I have problems in the office, I didn’t hear anything unnecessary from them after my revelation. They knew I am down. And they knew how to comfort me- that is to act as if nothing happened. That was what I needed. And I thanked them for that.

It is in times like this when I feel their love to me. Not that they don’t love me everyday, but it is during these times of despondency when you get to appreciate it at greater extent. And I love my parents so much for loving me unconditionally. I wish I am doing enough for them to feel the immensity of my love, respect and appreciation of them. I wish I could tell it to them straight.

Note: My mom got sick today. I hope it won’t get so serious. Money is not so easy to come lately.

Something light: I’m running my second 5k race on August 1 for the Rexona Run 2010 in Mall of Asia grounds. I think it’s a nice way to get back to fitness after getting sick for a week. It’s a nice way to divert my attention away from the negativities also. And the singlet for the run is the best so far. The color black and gold look so classic. And the digital timing chip called D-Tag will be introduced in this race that’s why I’m excited. I hope the run wouldn’t be a disaster (an epic fail) like the Ace Hardware Eco-friendly Run.

Sorry for the messy room in the background.

Good luck to me! Hope to set a new personal best!

Photo credits.

The Incident

Mistake of my recent past is haunting me. I am now reaping the bad fruit of the rotting seed I planted- a rotten seed which I have regretted sowing. Or have I really regretted it?

It was some time last April when the pressure of the busy season seen my worst. The long hard kept grievances I have towards the place I’m working for and some people in it have escaped my control and find its way, of all places, in Facebook. Yes, I have lambasted some people in there. Though they were unnamed, some didn’t need to guess who I was referring to. And too bad for me, not all eyes reading the message empathizes with me. To make things worst, it catches the attention of the wrong people. What was just a plain silent protest became so big and I found myself defenseless. I reviewed my options but I realized the situation really left me with nothing much to turn to. And so I retracted what has slipped from my emotions. I expressed my apologies to those whom I think were affected, who is worthy enough of my humility, and those who have wrongfully thought I was referring to- yep, including to them. And yet my ego still left some exceptions.

Still, it was really hard to take back what has been said. The damage has been done. I just don’t know what damage they were referring to. Was it an insult to their image? A damage existing long before my assault? A damage of I don’t know how it adversely affect the place I work for…

The retraction was difficult. It was like literally eating the barf after the vomit. But I did it just to fix things. It did… or so I thought?

After the busy season, it was a tradition for the place I work for to give us, the employees, the so called “performance bonus”. I have received the same benefits before and it’s just normal for me to expect the same this year. But I should’ve learned the value of “not expecting”, of “come what may”. Yet, I kept contending the idea ‘coz it’s just normal for someone to look forward to something especially if efforts were given. What more in my case who have dedicated beyond the necessary. My officemates ((who shared the same vigor with me) my clients and my family bear witness to that hardship. But it was left unrecognized.

Last Friday, the bonus that has long been delayed was finally credited to the account of the employees. A lot rejoiced knowing the rate given was above the normal. The mood was festive. It was worth the wait for everyone… except for me. I checked my account balance and saw a meager amount to my dismay. I received a minute of what everybody has received. I was dumbfounded really. It’s something I couldn’t accept. Because for every known standards I can think of, I am more than deserving. I owe a lot from the place I work for, but I also worked my ass off for them and contributed somehow. I know I deserved better. But I didn’t complain immediately. I waited for the official pay slip to be disseminated before I whine around. Dinner time came and my officemates decided to eat out. But the pay slip that was normally given to staff at the same day was not distributed. Everybody thought that there might be some problem with the Accounting. And everybody thought that what happened to my bonus was a plain error. I took it as it is ‘coz I don’t want to ruin the party mood.

Saturday and Sunday passed without me worrying too much about the bonus ‘coz I, along with my peeps, chose to believe that it was an honest accounting error or the bank’s fault.

And ‘today’ came. I clarified the matter to our Accounting, but the instruction to them was to let my boss explain what happened. I was dumbfounded but that hinted me that something was wrong, and that it is not about technicalities. The bonus I received was on purpose. When my boss arrived early tonight, I was kinda hesitant to ask for the reason. I don’t know if I was just shy or I’m just afraid to know the real reason. The fear came from the thought that the fault must be really with me. But I have to know the reason either way.

My boss broke to me the reason in a nice way possible. But the subtlety was not enough to an unknown mixed emotions- anger, disappointment and bewilderment. I wanted to cry that very minute but I compose myself. I told myself that wouldn’t change a thing. My boss asked me if I understood what happened. I told her ‘no’, I didn’t. She repeated the reason as if I didn’t hear her right on. I still told her I don’t understand what happened. She knew what I was trying to imply. Then, there was a brief moment of silence. The old me might have started a long litany but I was able to hold down my rapid tongue. I sensed that my boss didn’t know how to end the short conversation and I felt there was nothing more to hear from her. I know that she might have felt bad for me. I tried to understand but I felt she could have done something to save me.

The reason? The shoutout I posted in Facebook was blamed as reason why my performance bonus depleted to its meager amount. The Facebook incident that I thought was over and settled months ago, was an open book surprisingly to all of them. And they took it as a way to get back at me, the way I read things. Because, aside from that incident, a lot had happened that might have added fuel to the fire. I didn’t know it was a big issue. There were no memos, no face-to-face dialogue. No something that could have hinted me of its gravity. But the silence they created was deceiving and the explosion happened when I least expect it. They could have talked it through me. Or better yet, ask me to resign. But they didn’t have the decency to tell it to me straight. That could have prevented me from the great expectations.

Was it all for the money? Yes, because I earned it. That’s the payment for the sleepless nights, the unpaid overtimes, the reimbursements left unfunded and for pride that was shattered many times. But more to that, the incentive was an insult to my being. Despite some uneasiness, I finished all the assignments given to me. Despite my protests, I remained loyal to the place I work for. I took pride being part of it. And all that was given in return was a low pay. A big slap in my face.

I wish they knew where I’m coming from…


My life will go on even without that money. It’s just that I promised some financial help to my mom and she’s kinda expecting it. Now, I don’t know how I am going to break the bad news that I received only P4,750, not the P28,500. And that twenty grand plus difference is really something.

I don’t know what’s the ultimate lesson after this event. Things are just unfolding. Everybody should learn from this. I must.

Note: I’m sorry for venting. I know the wound is fresh and that might have caused some biases. Sorry also for the wrong grammar or any rules I have violated from the English Language. I am just ranting spontaneously to lessen the stir. I just pray I’d be guided accordingly by God to discern well and eventually make a right decision after this. I hope tomorrow will be a better day.

I also told some friends that I won’t be blogging about the incident ‘coz I will have a way to let it all out tomorrow. But sometimes, an immediate escape is needed.

Photo credits to Glass and Mirror